I got all these text messages right before & during that last trial...unfortunately I didn't REALLY read them until only yesterday. I guess God was trying to speak to me for quite some time...but i was too busy not listening.
---God can do more with my weaknesses that with my strengths, more with my failure than with my success, more with my neediness than my confidence...
---Lean on God & don't try to solve the problem alone. Beneath the obvious issue can be a maze of root causes that only God can deal with through the Holy Spirit. Trust God to guide, comfort, & provide. Remember, He is the ultimate Burden Bearer.
---Prayer reveals new dimensions of God's love. It keeps us from becoming self-focused. Instead, we become focused on others. God takes our prayers & uses them to unlock doors of blessing in the lives of others.
---The value of spending time alone with God in prayer cannot be underestimated. Your heart will be purified and your motives will be sifted, clarifying your purpose and helping you view your life and circumstances from the perspective of God's Word.
I hadn't been praying, spending time alone with Him, or reading my Bible. I had become rilient on myself...even with my writing...i'm thinking that was why i havn't been able to write any poems lately...so i just posted pics of myself...the 2 that's inbetween the pics was what i just found in my journal from months back...so the 1st one lately was "Storms"...but look what it took for me to get that.
Lord, i'm sorry for not listening each time you tried to talk WITH me. I want to be in-tune with You...I want to be tuned-in to hear when You speak. I want to be abiding in You. I want to be in-step & in-sync with You. Where You go i wanna go...and where You are, that's where i want to be...Thank you for getting my attention...and yes, even for doing what You had to do to make me listen. But thank You also for being in it with me...And....THANK YOU LORD. THANK YOU LORD FOR ALLOWING THEM TO FORGIVE ME! THANK YOU FOR HAVING PEOPLE TO BE PRAYING FOR ME WHEN I NEEDED IT MOST. PLEASE HELP ME NOT TO STIR UP STRIFE! PLEASE HELP ME TO TRULY LOVE & NOT HATE. AND BY THE POWER OF YOUR HOLY SPIRIT, PLEASE CHANGE ME & MY HEART & MY BAD ATTITUDE & TRAIN MY TONGUE NOT TO SPEAK HURTFUL THINGS. LET ME AVOID SEEING EVIL, HEARING EVIL, & SPEAKING EVIL...AND LET ME NOT DWELL ON EVIL EITHER. LORD, THAT MY THOUGHTS WOULD BE ON YOU & ALL YOU DO. PLEASE HELP ME NOT TO HAVE PROBLEMS FORGIVING EITHER. PLEASE HELP ME NOT TO KEEP ANGER OR PAIN IN MY HEART. CLEANSE & PURIFY ME. THAT ANY ROOTS OF BITTERNESS & HATRED & PAIN WOULD BE TOTALLY UPROOTED SO THAT IT CAN'T KEEP GROWING & TANGLEING & CHOKING ME. BIRTH IN ME MORE CARE FOR OTHERS & COMPASSION FOR THE LOST. FILL ME & BAPTIZE ME IN YOUR HOLY SPIRIT. LET MY PRAYER LIFE GROW TO A DEEPER LEVEL. LET MY SPIRIT COMMUNE WITH YOURS THAT WHEN I DON'T KNOW WHAT OR HOW TO PRAY...FROM THE DEPTHS OF MY SOUL (or belly) WOULD COME GROANINGS THAT THOUGH I MAY NOT UNDERSTAND IT...YOU WOULD KNOW THE CRY OF MY SPIRIT. LORD, LET IT BE SO STRONG THAT IF SOMEONE WAS IN TROUBLE YOU WOULD NOT LET ME SLEEP OR EVEN THAT YOU WOULD AWAKEN ME OUT OF MY SLEEP & CAUSE ME TO INTERCEDE ON THAT PERSON'S BEHALF...LORD, THAT'S HOW MUCH I WANT TO BE IN-TUNE WITH YOU...AND EVEN MORE SO...LORD, YOU KNOW MY HEART'S CRY...PLEASE LET ME HEAR & KNOW YOUR VOICE...EVEN IF OTHER VOICES IN MY HEAD MAY TRY TO DROWN YOU OUT...LORD, LET IT BE YOUR VOICE THAT I WOULD RECOGNIZE & FOLLOW. THANK YOU LORD. AND IT'S IN THE MIGHTY NAME OF JESUS I PRAY. AMEN :-)