empty pages

I stare
As the empty page of my prayer journal stares back at me
As if laughing & mocking

Lord, I am empty
In desperate need to hear from You
Yet nothing

I listen
And in the stillness & quiet of morning
Only silence

I pray
Lord, I am thirsty. And I need a touch from You right now
My heart cries out to You

So, i wait
But then noises begin to blare, breaking the silence
I hear cars, horns, and an annoying bird that wont stop chirpping
But nothing more

Now i'm tired
Lord, i'm tired of waking early to meet with You
Only to feel as though I've been stood up

In frustration, I get up & peak out the window
I see a duck cleaning himself by the water's edge
An orange hanging from the branch of an old tree
Dew on a nearby bush
I see a bridge & a pond that looks dead & lifeless
________

Suddenly, worthless things take on a new meaning
It's all a matter of perspective
The tree is planted by the water's edge & through it...it draws strength
Hidden bellow ground, are roots that need a firm grip in the soil
The dead tree leaves need to fall off...just like the junk in our past
Deep within the tree, are rings, which show age...just like as we grow old with time & circumstances and we weather the different storms...our maturity starts to shows what's within
As the seasons change...the tree becomes stripped...to give way to new life...new leaves
In it's season, it bears new fruit
when it rains, it's leaves get refreshed, and as the drops roll down they begin to bless others just as it too received

Even the duck...goes back to the water frequently
As he proceeds to clean himself, he is pulling out his old feathers
And one more thing...it's limping... reminding me of the man who wrestled with God

The bridge is Jesus. God is the good soil on one side, and we are the other side
The water is the Holy Spirit

______________________

AND THEN...I get it! HE DID SPEAK! i just had to listen...this time with my eyes & an open heart, ready & willing to learn.